Top 10 Reasons Not to Surf (in the Ocean)
Whether you have been tempted to take up surfing, or already have been surfing and have not been able to quit yet, here are 10 reasons to strengthen your resolve to stay out of the ocean:
- Surfers Knots are real, ugly and very painful
- Surfers on average earn much less money than their non-surfing peers
- Surfing in the sun gives you wrinkles and ages you prematurely
- Fewer girls/guys will date a surfer than will date a non-surfer
- Surfers Ear requires someone drill into your ear to restore your hearing
- Surfboards increase your carbon footprint. Very uncool.
- Surfing annoys the Great White Sharks of Jaws fame
- Where do you think sewer water drains?
- Giant Killer Squid have moved into the coastal waters of California
- I'm already in the lineup
If you do go in the water, vaya con dios my friend. We (your girlfriend & I) will remember you well.
